


Night Terror

by merlins_sister



Category: Stargate: Atlantis
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-04
Updated: 2012-03-04
Packaged: 2017-11-01 02:59:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/351195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/merlins_sister/pseuds/merlins_sister
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At night the darkest thoughts can scare you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Night Terror

John woke with a gasp, sitting upright as his body grappled for breath and consciousness. He forced himself to sit still as his heart thudded in shock at the horrific images his mind had created. As his heart finally started to slow he pulled his knees up and leant forward, rubbing his eyes as if he could remove the last picture from his brain.

He glanced at the other body in the bed. The warm, quiet body of his beautiful Kate. He let his eyes follow the silhouette of her curves through the sheet before settling on her serene face, her hair glistening in the soft moonlight coming through the window. The contrast with the last image in his dream made him feel sick. Then her face had been slack, her eyes open but no longer seeing. Her hair had dripped with blood from a bullet hole in her head. The assailant had been faceless again, but the scenario new. Didn't matter though. All the dreams ended the same way.

He swung his legs out of the bed and stood up, surprised to find them still shaking slightly. He slowly padded his way to the bathroom, closing the door so the low light wouldn't disturb Kate. He leant forward on the wash basin, and took another deep breath to control his emotions. A niggling voice in his head spoke again.

"You've made her the most vulnerable person on the base," it said. "Your selfishness has made her a target."

He closed his eyes as nausea rose in him again. He had kept himself apart from others for so long, not allowing relationships to flourish for fear of the consequences. Was it so wrong of him to try and change that now he had found someone he could love so deeply, and feel so much stronger with? Was he such a terrible person for wanting that?

"John?"

Kate's soft voice broke into his thoughts. He pulled himself up straight.

"Are you all right?"

He forced a smile on his face. "Fine. Just had a bad dream and didn't want to disturb you."

She nodded slightly before giving him the look that he both loved and hated. 'I can see right through you, John Sheppard,' it said. It both scared him and comforted him to know she had that ability. He wondered how much she knew of what was currently tormenting him.

"Come back to bed," she said with a quiet smile. "No bogeymen in here."

A genuine smile broke out on John's face at the standard joke on Atlantis. Who needed bogeymen when there were the Wraith, Genii, and other numerous nefarious humans and aliens to deal with?

He threw some water on his face before following her back. He climbed in and wrapped himself tightly around her. He took a deep breath to control his fears that the dream would come to visit again, trying to focus instead on the warmth of his lover's body, the sweet smell of her that clung to him through the day, and kept him more sane than he was prepared to admit.

"If you ever don't do something that has to be done, because of me, then your life will not be worth living, Colonel."

John's eyes flew open at Kate's words, shock at exactly how much she had guessed silencing him.

She turned to look at him. "Okay?"

John couldn't meet her eyes. He didn't want to say okay. He didn't want to admit that one day there might not be another option than to sacrifice her life for another.

But what could he do but admit the reality of the situation? Kate had. Was he not as strong?

"Okay," he replied before lifting his eyes to meet hers. He saw the determination in her eyes, and felt a sudden lift in his soul. God, how he loved brave, smart women. How he loved *this* brave, smart woman.

"I love you," he whispered before kissing her gently.

"I love you," she replied before gently stroking his face. "And believe me there is nothing you can do as the Colonel to me that can change that."

He nodded his understanding. "I wish... " he started, before trailing off. There was too much to wish for in this part of the universe. Perhaps too much to wish for in this life.

She kissed him again. "Get some rest," she said softly. "Morning will come soon enough." She pulled herself in closer, John's arms quickly wrapping tightly around her, stronger for a while in the knowledge that he wasn't alone anymore.


End file.
